• Excuses, excuses!  It never ceases to amaze me what creative ideas people come up with to get out of doing things.  The only baffling point is how they think the rest of us will accept those excuses time and time again.  I think everyone at some point in life defers responsibility and makes an excuse.  Excuses to keep out of the hot seat and avoid trouble, excuses to avoid giving time and energy, whatever the reason.  But at least the responsible and aware among us call it what it is: an excuse.  I figure, as long as you’re able to look at yourself in the mirror and feel good about yourself in general, then make the occasional excuse and move on.  What this page (rant!) is about is the person whose entire life, or lack of, becomes one big excuse.  First let’s talk about what each excuse really says to others —

    1.  – I’m too tired = I don’t think it is (or you are) worth my energy.

    2.  – I’m depressed or in a bad mood (or the very old – it’s that time of the month) = Nothing is going to make me happy so why bother even trying?

    3.  – I don’t have time = It’s (or you are) not important enough for (to) me to make time.

    4.  – I’ve tried everything = I expect to fail so no point putting in the effort.

  I don’t really want to try so don’t give me any suggestions- I’ll just shoot them down as soon as you launch them.

    5.  – This is just who I am and you should accept me as is = I’m lazy and not willing to work on myself in order to improve.
  You and our relationship don’t matter enough for me to put in the effort.

    6.  – I have bad luck = I want somebody to hand everything to me on a platter and don’t really want to work all that hard for anything.

    7.  – There are no jobs out there and no one is hiring = I don’t want to work and my ego is too large to accept jobs I consider beneath my impossible-to-meet standards.

    8.   – We can’t go out because we don’t have enough money = I don’t care enough to come up with creative activities that we can do on a budget or ways to re-distribute our money.

    9.   – I’m not smart enough = I have no desire to learn what I need to improve my life and marketability.

    10. – I don’t have the tools that I need to succeed = I can’t figure out how to make it happen with the resources I have so it’s easier to externalize the blame rather than point the finger at myself.

    At first you will get away with your excuses but eventually they catch up to you, and others catch on to you.  To those chronic excuse makers — You should know that one day your family, friends and those around you will issue the ultimatum: “put up or shut-up.”  If you don’t rise to the occasion and stop making excuses you will lose their (and your own self-) respect and confidence.  You might really begin to believe your own excuses and believe that you can’t achieve your goals.  That’s when others will step back and look elsewhere to get their needs met. When those around you stop asking for your help you should not feel relief, you should really start to worry. Because what they’re really saying is that they’ve given up on you and cannot count on you.  You are no longer needed.  They will find others who they can count on. So, before it is too late, get over your excuses, address your fears of failure and stop externalizing blame!

    Let’s be honest – most excuses boil down to lazy self defeat.  If you really think you suffer from depression, then see a doctor. There is help.  But for those who have taken lazy on as a profession yet do not want to eventually lose the people they care about in their lives the cure is simple- get up and put in some honest effort to keep/regain your own and others’ respect.  There is no time to waste.  This is calling you out.  We all see through your excuses and in seriousness so do you.  It is now time to stand up and join in.  While you still have people in your life who want and need you.